As I think about my life back home and how many changes I can and can not see coming for me, I think about how do the peoples lives here in Haiti change because we come here.
In my perspective we live in a society that always looks down at people because we think we are better than they are. We must be better then they are because we have better clothes, a better house, a better family, a better education, a better, well, everything. That social standard that has been set in America is completely on the opposite spectrum here in Haiti. Yes, I am sure that Haiti has some form of "food chain" but it is not as obvious to me as it is in the states. We may be bringing down donated clothes and supplies that are needed here to survive and in that way I can physically see how we are helping. But when I go and interact with the Haitian population that I am able to make contact with I sometimes feel that we aren't making an emotional effort to invest our time in the beautiful Haitian people.
Even though I can see some of the difference we are making here in Haiti, I feel more of a change in myself. For the past couple of weeks I have been feeling empty, which I think I mentioned in my last blog, and I am finding that inside I am filling up, quite rapidly, with the love of Jesus and God and also with the love of the Haitian children. Their laughs and smiles are so contagious and even more so when they sing "God is so good, is so good, is so good," or when Wilson will sing "TohToh Boqee" and the children will reply back "A-ah, A-ah".
The major question everyone seems to be asking themselves is "what is God trying to teach me." Some can't put their fingers on it just yet, but I think I have figured out what God is trying to teach me in my own journey of faith: Sometimes PEOPLE are not in a need of a fix, but their THINGS do. And vise versa with me. I feel that I have parts of me that are broken and the beautiful people and experiences of Haiti are fixing me.
My biggest delight of the day that I felt filled me up most was teaching a young boy, Marqee, at the home for the sick and dying how to say the english alphabet. When he got it down he would not stop saying it with a grin a mile wide. What a blessing to see all of this happiness in a place full of doubt.
I hope everything is going well back home. (: God bless you and the Haitian people!